Terms of Use & Disclaimer

Effective Date: 9/11/2025
Website: The Honest Obituary (www.thehonestobituary.com)

1. Introduction

Welcome to The Honest Obituary. By accessing or using this website, you agree to these Terms of Use. If you don’t agree, please leave now (and maybe come back when you’re ready to be honest). This site is meant to be funny, cathartic, and brutally truthful, but it is also user-generated content. That means: the things you read here are written by everyday people, not by us.

2. User-Generated Content

• Anything you post on The Honest Obituary (comments, obituaries, limericks, etc.) belongs to you, but by posting, you give us a worldwide, royalty-free, perpetual license to display, share, archive, and promote it on the site and related platforms.
• We do not guarantee accuracy, truth, or factual basis of any content submitted.
• Posts reflect personal opinions only.

3. Prohibited Content

We don’t censor honesty; we do have limits. You may not post content that:

• Contains threats of violence or incitement
• Constitutes hate speech targeting protected groups
• Contains threats or bullying
• Nudity of any kind
• Sexually suggestive content
• Self-harming content
• Repetitive comments or posts
• Posts or comments trying to contact users without their consent
• Fake accounts and or impersonation of any individual or entity
• Infringes on someone else’s copyright or trademark
• Contains private/identifiable information without consent (e.g., Social Security numbers, addresses)
• We reserve the right to remove any content, at our sole discretion, if it crosses into illegal or harmful territory.

4. Disclaimers:

• The Honest Obituary is not responsible for what users write.
• Posts are personal opinions, satire, parody, or catharsis. They should not be taken as verified facts.
• We do not endorse or verify user submissions.
• To the fullest extent permitted by law, The Honest Obituary disclaims liability for any damages arising from use of the site or reliance on content here.

5. Section 230 (For U.S. Users)

This site operates under the protections of Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act. That means we are not legally responsible for the words, opinions, or claims of our users.

6. Intellectual Property

All branding, logos, taglines, and original text created by The Honest Obituary are protected by copyright and trademark law. Do not use our name or logo without permission.

7. Governing Law

These Terms are governed by the laws of the state of Arizona, without regard to conflict of law provisions.

8. Cancellation Policy – Because We Care (About Your Money)

To cancel your subscription, please email info@thehonestobituary.com. Please note:

If your subscription has already passed, congratulations! You’ve already received the intangible, fleeting comfort of our services. Unfortunately, comfort is non-refundable. That ship has sailed, been cremated, and lovingly placed in a biodegradable urn.

However, if services have not been rendered perhaps your dearly beloved is still clinging to this mortal coil, you may receive a refund. But only with one week's notice, because we require exactly seven days to emotionally prepare ourselves for your financial backpedaling.

A transaction fee will apply, of course, because processing imaginary sorrow into digital currency takes effort. The fee ranges from $1.99 to $15.99, determined by a complex algorithm involving moon phases, the stock price of printer ink, and how emotionally devastating your cancellation email is.

Thank you for choosing The Honest Obituary, where death is certain, but your refund is not.

9. Contact

For legal inquiries, DMCA notices, or complaints:
Email: info@thehonestobituary.com
Mailing Address: The Honest Obituary 29855 N Tatum Blvd, Cave Creek AZ 85331

Privacy Policy

Effective Date: 9/11/2025
Website: The Honest Obituary www.thehonestobituary.com

Privacy Policy - Introduction

At The Honest Obituary, we value your privacy, even if you’re writing about people, you don’t. This Privacy Policy explains what information we collect, how we use it, and how we keep it safe (or at least safer than grandma’s password written on a sticky note).

By using this site, you agree to the terms of this Privacy Policy. If you don’t like it, you’re free to close the tab and go back to polite obituaries full of lies.

2. Information We Collect

Here’s what we might collect when you interact with our site:

• Account Info: If you create an account, we’ll ask for your email and maybe a username (so your obituary masterpieces aren’t lost).
• Submissions: Anything you write, post, or upload. That includes obituaries, comments, limericks, and even those questionable haikus.
• Technical Stuff: IP addresses, browser type, device info, and cookies (not the chocolate chip kind, sorry).
• Voluntary Data: If you contact us, sign up for a newsletter, or share info, we’ll keep it to respond and manage your requests.

3. How We Use Your Info

We use your data to:

• Run and improve The Honest Obituary
• Display your posts and keep them in our archives (forever, probably)
• Send you updates, newsletters, or important notices (sparingly, because spam is tacky)
• Prevent fraud, abuse, or posts that break our Terms of Use

4. Sharing Your Info

We don’t sell your info. Period. We may share it:

• With service providers (like hosting, analytics, or email tools) who help run the site
• If required by law, subpoena, or court order (we hope it never comes to that, but people write wild stuff here)
• During a business transfer (if we get acquired by some rich eccentric who loves honest obits)

5. Cookies & Tracking

We use cookies to:

• Keep you logged in
• Remember your settings
• Analyze traffic (so we know what’s working and what’s boring)

You can turn cookies off in your browser, but the site may act cranky if you do.

6. Data Retention

We keep your posts and account data as long as the site exists, because history (and pettiness) deserves to be preserved. If you’d like us to remove your account, email us and we’ll do it… reluctantly.

7. Security

We use reasonable measures (encryption, secure hosting, etc.) to protect your data. But let’s be real: no system is 100% safe. Use a strong password, don’t share it, and please don’t make it “password123.”

8. Children’s Privacy

This site is not intended for anyone under 13. If you’re a kid, go play outside. Sorry, we do not want to deal with your parents because you decided to play on our site.

9. Your Rights

Depending on where you live (e.g., California, EU), you may have rights to access, update, or delete your personal info. Email us if you want to exercise those rights. We’ll work with you, unless it involves deleting your ex’s obituary masterpiece.

10. Changes to This Policy

We may update this Privacy Policy occasionally. If we make big changes, we’ll post a notice on the site. Keep checking back if you care about this sort of thing.

11. Contact Us

Questions? Concerns? Want your info deleted?
Email: info@TheHonestObituary.com